Monday, June 05, 2006

Rainy Daze

The rain's been pouring down on NYC for four days straight, and today the clouds are still ominous and scary. I was trying to compile an adorable and trendy rainy day to do list for Yangabang, and then realized that such a thing is impossible; as rainy days are neither trendy nor adorable. So here's a to do list of 5 things I actually did this rainy weekend, in random order.

1. Smoke Hookah.

What better way to be stuck in doors than inside a smoke filled den, intimately lit, with your favorite Saudi or Lebanese music strumming away overhead. If you want a light smoke, go with something herbal like Jasmine or Mint. Double Apple is better with friends, and while you're at it, have a Turkish Coffee to ensure lively conversation.



2. Watch a Footballer's Wives Marathon.

Sex, bitchery, shirtless Euro hunks, and deliciously tacky clothes. British people are crazy, so their #1 soap is definitely something to be committed to. In just four hours, I watched Tanya Turner do a gang of coke with her talon-like manicure, kill her old grubby husband by literally 'fucking him to death', move in with Conrad Gates (the show's David Beckham) and drive his ex-wife Amber (A Bollywood version of Posh Spice) to attempted suicide. HOT.





3. Bleach Your Whites.

Come on, you know those whites need a good soak in some clorox. Pit stains begone! Mystery stains vanish! Soak them hot in your tub if you want to kill two birds with one stone so you can finally get rid of that grimy ring that's been there since...the last rainy day.




4. Try a New Drink.

As I am a committed wino-- I decided to jump on the whiskey train on The Rainy Friday Night. Just two glasses, and I didn't feel that drunk...yet definitely knew some of my brain cells couldn't see straight. I knew I was going to be a cheap date when I 'wobbled' on the way home! Oh Jack...you are so...warm.




5. Clean.

You know you should. Even if every thing looks clean, there's still that rat doodoo under the sink, or that mold on your toilet, or those eyebrow hairs on your sink. Maybe you should vacuum the shag rug or pull out couch, or do those binge eating dishes you've been avoiding. Or you could just take advantage of my alternative #5 thing to do in the rain: Get Laid.

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

hahahahahaha....i can't stop laughing... ^_^

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